This Is Helping Me Grieve Well

Oh, Mom would just love this!

Mom would be so excited!

Wouldn't this make Mom happy!

She'd get such a kick out of this!

It's been almost nine months since she entered heaven, yet Mom is still very much present. 

Speaking her name and drawing her right into anything worth celebrating has kept her spirit alive and well in my heart. 

It didn't start on purpose.  But it's ended up being natural.  And it's turned my mourning into gratitude. 

These days, when people, places, or things she enjoyed pop up, I invite her right into the conversation.  Delicious food.  The ocean's majesty.  House projects.  Lovely flowers or beautiful music.  Habitat for Humanity.  

And anything that revolves around her family's antics, adventures, and accomplishments. Nothing that mattered to any of us was too insignificant for her focused attention and enthusiastic response.  

Unbelievable!! she'd declare with a big smile.

She never drew attention to herself.  Never complained.  And found comfort and hope in her deeply personal relationship with Christ.  It was always about Him ... and everyone else who crossed her path.


Sure, there's still moments of intense sadness.  I want to send her snapshots of the great-grandkids and fill her in on all the latest happenings.  I feel my stomach jolt when we drive by the Quaker Meeting House Road exit or as I push the cart through the supermarket and spot the Belvita or Taster's Choice or Depends.  A big hug from one of her friends makes me ache with longing.  And some worship songs lead me into a puddle of grief that leaves me drained for the rest of the day.

Yet because His mercies are new every morning, the daily bounty of good and lovely and excellent and praiseworthy gifts of grace come surging in again, filling my heart with gratitude.  I'm compelled by Mom's life of extraordinary faith to focus on living in ways that honor Christ and would bring her a quiet satisfaction. 

Grieving well is enabling me to release the trauma of that awful, endless, final season of her life.  The pain is fading slowly but surely into the background even as peace and joy are taking center stage right where they belong.

What's helped you in your grief journey?  What's hindered it?

3:19-26, 31-33, 55-58