Sunday, April 10, 2016

In Which I Give My Husband the Last Word . . . & the Giveaway Winner is Announced!

I can think of no finer way to wrap up this Marriage Mini-Series than to have my husband put his 2 cents on the table.  Some people think he's opinionated, and that could be said, I guess.  But I've come to rely on him as a hard working, servant-hearted man of God ... with a tender, compassionate soul tucked beneath a wealth of common sense and solid wisdom.

To say that I'm grateful for the gift of who God's shaped him to be would be a ridiculously vast understatement.

I'm forever in love.




What could the other 1/2 of Linda, this guest writer, possibly have to say about marriage?  Probably nothing that has not been said before, though after celebrating 40 years of marriage on April 3rd, it seems there must be something to say.

I've kind of put this off for the month even though from time to time I was nudged.  Sure I had my excuses, what spouse doesn't?  Writing is not my strong point, in fact it's far from it.  But look what I've achieved here.  4 sentences and I have said absolutely nothing.

I have, though, over the month been thinking about what I'd write so here comes 2 observations after 40 years of marriage.

First,  I've learned to believe most things in life have a way of working themselves out.

We tend to get in the way, though.  Sometimes you do have to, but I'd bet 80% of the time most things just work themselves out fine without our extra hoopla or the great rodeos we like to create.

So about all we do with our overactive engagement is mess things up that will naturally happen anyway.

I will grant you for those 20%, engaging at full force is necessary.  If you can figure out which 80% to leave alone and which 20% to aggressively engage in, well you are better than me, so obviously this is a constant work in progress.

Second,  in the grand scheme of life, does it really matter?

Sure there are things in life we are passionate about, but everything can't have that same level of importance.  So like I could care little about what color flowers to plant, but woe to you if you put my hammer back in the wrong place.  Ok, a bit extreme in both cases but maybe it makes the point.

Many things can be answered by, 'ok, sounds fine.'

So maybe pick one or two things to be passionate about and let the rest go.

I'd like to say that after 40 years I got it all down, but the fact is, short of heaven, nothing is going to be perfect.

On a personal note {assuming Linda still allows me the floor}, I recognized years ago the Lord's calling on Linda to minister to people through conversations, counseling, coaching, and writing.  She is faithful not only to me, but to each of you.

So as in our marriage she wants the best for us, she wants equally the same for you.

Tim



*

And the winner of the $40 Amazon Gift card is ... 

Christine Malkemes
@

Congratulations!

*

INDEX



62 comments:

  1. Love the pic of you and Tim! Looks like the kinds of walks my sweetheart and I often take with pauses for a kiss now and then! Loved hearing from Tim and his affirmation of you is dear! This was an excellent mini-series! Thanks, my friend!!

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    1. You're a sweetheart! Your words bless me, friend. I'm grateful you enjoyed the series ...

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  2. Loved hearing from your husband! Loved this whole series! And those pictures are wonderful too!

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    1. Thanks for following along so faithfully, Jandi!

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  3. God bless you both. Happy 40th Anniversary.

    God bless.

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  4. Such a sweet picture at the end of this! And it is so true that in all aspects of life, to not take ALL things so seriously.

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    1. I've been told, more than a few times, to lighten up!

      ;-}

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  5. My Momma echos very similar sentiments. Her favorite saying is "Don't sweat the small stuff...and it's all small stuff." Congratulations on 40 years!

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    1. I bet that your Momma and my man would have alot in common!

      ;-}

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  6. Hi Linda! That last photo is ADORABLE!! How lovely that your husband would write his insights for your blog too. My husband would still be running if I asked him.
    Such grounded observations too. And he really respects your gift of counseling, both in your personal and blogging life. Tell him I think he's a keeper :)

    Happy Anniversary my friend. Your new life in a new place sounds like it's going very, very well.
    God's blessings,
    Ceil
    PS Congrats to Christine!!

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    1. Honestly, I think he would prefer running with your husband, Ceil! It's been a crazy month around here and yet he still showed up after we talked back and forth on what it would look like for him to make an appearance.

      Yep, a keeper he is.

      ;-}

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  7. "OK, sounds fine" is a phrase that can work miracles.

    http://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2016/04/your-dying-spouse-141-pride-goeth.html

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    1. Ain't that the truth.

      There's a lesson there for us all ...

      ;-}

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  8. What a satisfying conclusion in every way!
    Blessings to you both!
    And congratulations on 40 years!

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    1. You've been a faithful companion through this series, Michele. Thanks for sharing wisdom with us along the way ...

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  9. That was so beautiful!!! Love it, love it, love it!!!

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    1. Oh how very good to see you again!

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    2. Never left..........just "lurking"!! :-)

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    3. I love that you're here, Val ... whether you're quiet or outspoken!

      ;-}

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  10. It's so nice to hear from your man, Linda. Sounds like you're a match made in heaven. Thanks for letting him share too! :)

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    1. He did a bit of a chuckle and just a tad of eye-rolling when I read your 'match made in heaven,' Lisa! But he knows it's the truth!

      Me, too.

      ;-}

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  11. Thank Tim for his wisdom and his devotion to you. :) And Linda, I'm so glad you share with us your insight from years of counseling experience, too. I have always felt, like he said, that you want the best for each of us. :) Blessings and hugs to you!

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    1. That I want the best for each of my clients and readers and friends?

      Well, to me, that benediction was the highlight of Tim's post. For sure, Trudy.

      For sure.

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  12. thank you for winning! I'm so blessed. It was nice to hear from your man! Loved. Loved. Loved his attitude and so right. Now where do I put this hammer, again?

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    1. I've learned to ask where to put a prized possession of his instead of tossing it in a random place.

      And he, in turn, has learned the same!

      Congrats, Christine! Be sure to send me your address ... and enjoy your shopping spree!

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  13. The perfect ending! Well done, Tim & Linda, and congrats to Christine for the win, yay!

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    1. I spied a beautiful bluebird out the window this morning while writing my next post. As ever, I thought of you, my feather-loving friend!

      ;-}

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  14. Linda, this is great ... the humor, the practicality, the love and respect you and Tim clearly have for each other. And as I read, I couldn't help but think that Tim's two observations might also apply to parenting. :-) What a wonderful way to end the series!

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    1. Oh wow, Lois. YES! That never even crossed my mind, but how true that these are parenting insights, as well.

      No wonder the girls and their kiddos adore him so much ...

      ;-}

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  15. Sounds like a happily ever after to me. I believe such an ending is worth working for- loved the series. Just loved it. What a great topic choice.

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    1. Yes, there's been lots of work along the way. There's no pixie dust or fairy tales come true in the marriages I know of. Thanks for the reminder that we have to roll up our sleeves along the way ...

      ;-}

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  16. Kinda making me cry, friend. Because I just love you and I don't know it just speaks volumes to hear from your husband in this space too. <3

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    1. You've moved me by the kind words tumbling from your heart, Beth. Just too beautiful ... like you.

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  17. What wonderful thought. It's amazing to learn from the two of you and hear your wisdom. Cheers on 40 years! Here's to the next decade.

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    1. Well, you know us, warts and all, Jonathan.

      Here's to 40 years doubled to you and your lovely wife ...

      ;-}

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    2. Hear Hear (to the 40-years...not for the warts)!

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    3. 40 doubled would be 80 years for you and your bride!

      ;-}

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    4. We'd love to have that! Sounds amazing. I'd celebrate that anniversary in the year 2091 and would be north of 100. Oh boy...MK would be 76!

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    5. I guess we'll be missing THAT party ...

      ;-}

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  18. You never know. According to this article, (https://www.good.is/articles/humans-may-live-to-150) "The First Humans to Live to the Age of 150 Are Already Alive"!

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    1. Trust me, we won't be at the party. Really!

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  19. Wise man--what I especially love is his brevity and still saying it all!
    You got yourself a winner there, Linda!
    Blessings!

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    1. Sometimes, yes, sometime, brevity is his strength.

      ;-}

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  20. I'm your neighbour today at Purposeful Faith and I enjoyed your reflections here. Happy Anniversary to you both!

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    1. Carly ... thanks for saying 'hi' ...

      And welcome to our little community!

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  21. Wisdom and encouragement wrapped up in one, nice post. Well done, Tim. (And Linda!)

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    1. I'll tell him you said that, Kristi!

      ;-}

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  22. Thanks Tim and Linda for this wisdom!! #RaRaLinkup

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  23. It's so nice to meet you, Tim. I completely agree with your wonderful wife's calling and I'm so thankful she followed it. This space has ministered to me greatly since I was introduced to Linda a couple of years ago. Congrats on 40 years! I love your 2 points here. Complete truth in both of them. Thank you :).

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    1. Well thanks, Candace. Really. You've encouraged me on this rainy afternoon ...

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  24. Such a beautiful story of love you've shared Linda, an inspiration indeed... Tim - a job well done in your tribute to a very special lady! Congratulations on the 40 years, and to the very special winner as well :)

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    1. Thanks for all the kindness you've shared!

      ;-}

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  25. Linda,
    What a treat to hear from your husband! I love how he affirmed your talents and the work you're doing in encouraging and supporting those that God brings into your life. I'm sure you realize you have a gem of a husband! :)

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    1. Yes, he's a rare gem, for sure.

      Thanks for hanging in with me through the series, Valerie. Speaking of gems ... that'd be you, girl!

      ;-}

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  26. Woo hoo! We get to hear the wisdom from Tim that comes fro a 40 year collaboration in marriage to our sweet Linda! Now the marriage-mini series is complete! You are quite the wordsmith, Tim! I'm surprised you haven't stepped up to the plate sooner or more often. I know that you, like Gary, have aspects of your wife's blogging world that you'd rather leave up to her. But I'm so glad you pushed past your reservations and graced us with these thoughts. They are wise and very thought-provoking. God bless you two! You make a great team!

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    1. Dear Beth ~ Tim really likes you and Gary ... your visit here will be the icing on the cake for him! We've had fun reading through everybody's kind and enthusiastic comments ... it's really blessed us.

      Maybe I'll see if he'll pop in and make an appearance here and there ... if you'll get Gary to do the same over at Messy Marriage!

      ;-}

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  27. Love it! Your husband and my husband sound like they have a lot in common (not just great taste in wives!) :)
    Congratulations on 40 years and thank you for this series!

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    1. Would be so cool if THEY could get together like we do, huh?

      Thanks for your encouraging words, Sarah ...

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  28. Loved your marriage series. You were amazingly transparent which made the series real and helpful. Your writing expertise and style are very captivating. Once you begin reading your material it is very difficult to stop.

    Keep up the excellent work. I look forward to your blog every week. Keep it coming.

    {via text}

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    1. You've been a great big encourager along the way! Many thanks for all those gracious words ...

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'I want the people in my life to know that when they come to me, with whatever is on their mind or heart, they will be heard. I am dedicated to hearing the hearts of those around me.'
~ Adam McHugh, The Listening Life

Linda