A CHRIST-CENTERED
WEEKEND NEWSLETTER
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gentle conversation & calming snapshots
uplifting linkage & occasional surprises
for those who delight in doing life
in the company of kindred spirits
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:18
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| soulspace |
I browsed through the over-stuffed racks, searching for a few Mother's Day cards that gently acknowledged that life and love are hard. I quickly shoved most of them back into their plastic nests. The messages were utterly inane or ridiculously unrealistic.
Finally, tucked way on the side I found several that said exactly what I longed to say. I paid for them and then went on my way, wondering why we can't be more honest about how we really feel about what's going on.
Yes, even and especially on Mother's Day.
Your Mother's Day may be filled with candy and flowers and bright shining children serenading you as they serve you a delightful breakfast in bed and cater to your every whim like you're the queen of the universe.
I hope this is true for you. I really do. God bless you. Please enjoy every minute.
Or you simply might not want to get out of bed at all. And wouldn't even think of darkening the door of the church because you just cannot imagine seeing all those happy faces (many of whom are living your reality, you just don't know it).
Death has visited your family. Or your dreams have gone up in smoke. Or perhaps an overwhelming combination of all kinds of losses come bubbling to the top on the holidays. The grief is so real and palpable that you don't quite know what to do with it all.
Sadness, hurt, regrets, disappointments, pain, frustration, and sorrow all crowd on in and whisper lies that masquerade as truth.
But God says that you are beloved. Valued. Priceless. Forgiven. Unlike us humans, He's not going to pass away. He won't leave you, betray you, or drop out of sight. He's not going to change like shifting shadows or give you an attitude or be disrespectful to you. His love is faithful and kind and will last 'til the end of time. And beyond.
Wherever you find yourself this weekend, overflowing with joy or laden with sorrow, I pray that you will have peace in your heart knowing that you've loved the best you could with what you had at the time. And that the Spirit will bring good memories to comfort you and a life-giving measure of hope for tomorrow. And the next day.
Do something kind for yourself, ok?
And if all is well, reach out to a sister who's struggling. You won't have far to look. Or maybe forward this to a griever who needs to know that she's not alone.
Linda
Mother's Day on the Porch
(2021)
A Thank You Note to Our Spiritual Mothers
(2020)
Reflections For An Uneasy Mother's Day
(2019)
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Beautifully said! Celebrating Mother’s Day is a lovely sentiment according to the cards lined up at the store. But there is just as much sadness behind the scenes as there is joy projecting on the faces of the women who want you to believe all is well. I pray you find a place to hold joy and sadness on this Mother’s Day.
ReplyDeleteYes, yes, Mary. My heart breaks for our sisters who are stuck in that place of wanting those around them to 'believe that all is well' when the opposite is true.
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I found the same thing in the racks of cards. Maybe it's a reminder that deep sentiments from the heart can't be manufactured. The last few Mother's Day my mom was living she didn't know me due to her dementia. I sent the cards anyway, mostly for me. These memories lay gentle in my heart as I continue to thank God for her example and witness. As always, thank you for your sensitive heart. I hope your Mother's Day is filled with joy. - Debby
ReplyDelete'Maybe it's a reminder that deep sentiments from the heart can't be manufactured.' You're right, Debby, no wonder it's often a futile search to find the perfect card. If I find one that miraculously checks all my boxes, I usually buy a bunch of them. But that's seldom ...
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As I've gotten older as a pastor I have tried to become more sensitive to those women who don't fit the "mother mode." Either never were or are no longer due to life circumstances. I feel for those who are in either one. Life is hard enough without adding more pain to the circumstances. Unwed mothers. Barren mothers-who don't-want-to-be." Those who have lost their mothers or children. UGH! Maybe a handmade card with our own thoughts is better than trying to find one to fit is best? I hope your pain of losing your mom is lightened by the love of others.
ReplyDelete' Life is hard enough without adding more pain to the circumstances.'
DeleteAh, Bill, you have a true Shepherd's heart. I'm guessing your congregation would 100% agree.
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Thanks for this timely reminder, Linda. While this day is a joy for many, it brings pain to many as well. May God give grace to all.
ReplyDeleteYour benediction is perfectly spoken, Barbara - 'May God give grace to all.' Grace to those who suffer, grace to those who reach out to empathize and listen, validate and shed a tear.
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We do need to remember those for whom Mother's Day is not a happy or joyous occasion, Linda. Since my mother died, it's become harder for me for sure. And with my children not living close by, it makes the actual day more difficult. But I will pray for those who feel alone and discouraged on this day, and give thanks to God for allowing me to be both a mother and a grandmother.
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
Yeah, I hear you, Martha. I sure wish the kids lived closer.
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It doesn't get better, either. At least, it doesn't for me. And we're talking decades, try as I may, fake it as I do. This is a beautiful, honest, important post for so many.
ReplyDeleteOh Jeanie, I'm so sorry that this deepest heartache is lingering long. Faking it only works temporarily and only on the surface. It makes things harder, doesn't it. Thank you so much for keeping it real here. I'm praying for peace for your hurting heart, friend ...
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That's one of my favorite verses, especially when I'm feeling down. Thanks for sharing this, Linda. Hope you do something kind for yourself as well.
ReplyDeleteDon't you just love how God doesn't just disappear when things are hard for us ... He's closer than our next breath, He is our heartbeat. I'm so grateful.
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I’m going to take this reminder into the Mother’s Day brunch I’m speaking at on Saturday. The women there, I am sure, will come with a variety of different stories and feelings about the day.
ReplyDeleteAnd I really try to avoid card racks. So unhelpful…🙄
Praying for you right now ... I'm confident you have a message that someone there will need to hear. Please let me know how it goes, ok?
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Thank you for wanting to know…
DeleteIt was glorious— new faces but a few I recognized and a sweet time of connection during the talk and afterwards.
I love teaching!
So glad it went well, friend. Loving what we do is just the biggest joy, isn't it ... and speaking that gratitude right out loud is the icing on the cake. Thank You, Lord.
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Linda I so appreciate the encouragement here my friend. After recently losing my mom, and yet another year without hearing from 2 prodigal children, Mother's Day just. hurts. But praise God for His comfort and presence! Thank you, my friend, and Happy Mother's Day to you, I know it is likewise bittersweet.
ReplyDeleteDonna, God has kept you close to my heart since I read your words last night. 'I'm so sorry' seems so insignificant. Oh those prodigals. May He bring them home to your waiting heart. And blanket you with comfort, hope, and peace as you grieve.
DeleteJesus, please.
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Thank you for this beautiful message of compassion for those of us who aren't as happy on Mother's Day as we'd like to be. I appreciate your wisdom here, Linda!
ReplyDeleteThis is a tough one, isn't it. Trusting God will continue to speak peace into your waiting heart, my friend ...
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Linda, this truly warmed my heart. Mother's day is not happy for me and I thank you for sharing these encouraging words with Sweet Tea & Friends this month my friend. {{Hugs}} & Blessings.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry this is one of those days, Paula. I hope there were pockets of sunshine in there for you ...
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Yes, there were.
DeleteThis is a beautiful message for those of us who aren't as happy on Mother's Day as we are expected to be.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate the encouraging words, Linda.
Hugs and blessings
Yeah, it was a hard day for many. I trust you feel loved, heard, and treasured by the One who loves you best of all. Rest well this evening ...
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It really seems unreal to me,
ReplyDeleteand perhaps it may be wrong,
but fevers burned out memory,
and childhood now is gone.
No parents and no laughing friends,
no siblings and no school,
no ball games and no let's-pretend's,
no gatherings at grand-dad's pool,
so Mother's Day falls kinda flat
and Father's Day likewise,
for there's nowhere to hang my hat
or rest my weary heart and eyes
in having once been wrapped in love
save that which comes from God above.
Thank you for this post, Linda. Much love to you, dear friend.
ReplyDeleteSending love to you, too. I hope you survived Mother's Day well, friend.
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It's a sad reality that Mother's Day brings pain and regret for so many people, for so many reasons. I hope that Christ-followers are all generous in showing compassion to those who are hurting on these kinds of special days. Good post. Visiting from IMM today
ReplyDeleteYes, Kym, Christ-followers have an unlimited amount of compassion and empathy and grace that comes from God Himself. We can love deeply, endlessly only because of Him. I am so thankful ...
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Thank you for this - it is hard sometimes to choose to live joy when society says it's time to live joy. Mother's Day is one of those bittersweet times. Thank you for giving voice to it.
ReplyDeleteBittersweet is the perfect word for it all, isn't it ...
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