Wednesday, June 15, 2016

For When Your Man Feels 'Less Than'

The key that unlocks a man's heart, that equips him to be all he was created to be, is RESPECT.  It's his truest love language, it's his finest motivator.  

When a man feels respected, it unleashes a healthy power that enables him to love well.  It's the juice that propels him to soar upward professionally.  

And it's the sure foundation that allows him to lead with sensitive wisdom 
in his home, church, workplace, and community.




Based on my years as a pastoral counselor, here's what I know to be true ... when all is said and done, just about every guy I've talked with feels 'less than' in some area of his life.  Underneath the burden of whatever challenge he hauls into the counseling office, he has bought the lie that  ... {continue reading}


I'm guest posting over at Alecia Simersky's Calling All Men Series today.  If you've got any men in your world, you'll find what she's offering this month to be relevant and enlightening.  And guys ... well, I sure want you to weigh in on this.   

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14 comments:

  1. I am contemplating printing this post out and quietly leaving it on the kitchen counter. I just have to figure out if the benefits outweigh the possible fallout. Great post!!

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    1. Praying you'll know exactly how to love best ...

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  2. Linda,
    Great post over at Alecia's place! I left a comment there but appreciate your wisdom and experience not only as a counselor but as a wife who loves God and loves her husband! Such inspiration! :)

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    1. Well thanks for taking the time to jump from here to there and back again, friend!

      You bless me so with your kind words.

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  3. Linda, I genuinely have difficulties with what you have written here.

    As a man, I honestly have never worried or bothered as to whether I am respected or not. Perhaps I'm self-assured, thick skinned, or just stupid. I don't know. All I know is that I have always tried to do my best in life, marriage, work and so on. What others think of me is their problem; not mine.

    I accept, however, that many men feel, and need, to be respected. I have met such people. And I admire the work that you do as a counsellor to help such individuals. Thank you for that.

    God bless.

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    1. Thanks for weighing in, Victor! Many men feel the same way that you do, they've weathered life's storms and come through well. You are blessed indeed!

      My conclusions have come from working with men who find themselves in the place where they need to seek counseling. Not all men have been wounded along the way, but for those who have been, there is a road toward healing that they are wise to take.

      Again, I'm grateful that you're here, that you've contributed to this dialogue. You're an influencer and I always appreciate your presence at this virtual table!

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  4. WOW! This soooooo hit home, this is my man, all of it. This post just confirms all that I know. I pray that my husband would see that there is more by admitting and that he can get help. He doesn't even see that he is worthy of counseling. SAD!

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    1. Trusting that there was something here to encourage your spirit, to equip you in showing Christ's love to your man.

      You are welcome here!

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  5. Made it to Alecia's site, better late than never, and managed a comment. In considering the topic, I find that I'm skewed about 90 degrees from most men, so I don't know if that comment will have any relevance or whether it'll just be an entertaining outlier.

    Well, I hope it's entertaining.

    https://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2016/06/your-dying-spouse-169-hooks-to-future.html

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    1. I wouldn't say you're skewed at all, pal. And you're hardly an 'entertaining outlier.'

      You're part of the community ... and we've all been wounded in one way or another, ya' know?

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  6. Thanks for guest posting, Linda! I've so enjoyed reading through the comments. The takeaways are priceless. And I find it SO interesting that some men can't relate at all...there are men out there who made it through childhood with a healthy sense of self!? I want to meet their mama's and daddy's and give them a big hug.

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    1. Absolutely, yes, Alecia! There are lots of men who are healthy and wise ... some because of their upbringing and some despite.

      Thanks for opening the doors to this important conversation, friend. I think it's given lots of us cause for pause ...

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'I want the people in my life to know that when they come to me, with whatever is on their mind or heart, they will be heard. I am dedicated to hearing the hearts of those around me.'
~ Adam McHugh, The Listening Life

Linda