How Can I Ever Forgive Myself?

When it comes to graciously extending forgiveness, the hardest person to forgive is often is the one in the mirror.  For sinful choices or stupid decisions or outright betrayal.  It could have been yesterday afternoon ... or decades back.  So if the topic seems overwhelming or like an unattainable goal, please let me say that you're not the only one wrestling with what this looks like.  

You're in good company.  

Let's talk.

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Who would have guessed that forgiving ourselves would be such a seemingly impossible decision? 

Blame it on the enemy of our souls. 

If you've done the Christian life for any length of time, it's no big surprise to you that the master deceiver prowls around like the ferocious evil beast he is.  

He whispers or shouts, hissing in the most evil tones.  His insidious lies weigh us down, immobilize us, and keep us stuck in a pit that seems to suck us deeper and deeper into self-condemnation and loathing.  Looking to push our buttons, trip us up, eat us alive, his goal is to render us useless for the victorious kingdom life we've been called to live.  

After awhile of this decidedly deceptive brainwashing, we're all too prone to believe him.

We get lost in the ugly mire of woulda / coulda / shoulda's, defining ourselves by everything negative we've ever said or done instead of defining ourselves by our Savior.  We become great big losers in our own eyes, hopelessly fixated on our past screw-ups, weighed down by our accumulation of cumbersome baggage ... instead of focusing on the One who paid the priceless penalty for all our sin.

Believe it or not, there's some twisted payoff in staying stuck in this graceless mire.  At least it's familiar territory.  It might be a lousy place to live but somehow, in a weird way, it slowly but surely has begun to feel like home.  An incredibly dysfunctional one that ends up holding us hostage.

'Cause who am I if I'm not defined by all my sins and shame?  What would my life look like if I drew a line in the sand and said 'enough is enough, I'm done with this.' 


If we look in the mirror and see a perpetual loser or a masked failure, we have not accepted the forgiveness God has offered us.  The more in love we are with Him, the quicker we'll be able to discern when the Spirit is clearly putting His powerful finger on specific sins in our lives.  And those are the times we need to own our stuff.  

Experience the remorse, confessing every detail of the choices we've made to the One who longs to see us unshackled.  

Ask for and receive the desperately yearned for forgiveness.  

Claim our identity in Christ.  Believe who He says we are.  Redeemed.  Precious.  Beloved.  Priceless.  Forgiven.

Forgive ourselves.

And then move forward in freedom to all He has for us to be, to do.

How much time and energy have we wasted wringing our hands and beating ourselves up?  What opportunities have we missed because we were looking backward instead of upward?

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 
1 John 1:9

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
2 Corinthians 5:17

Jesus said, If you hold to my teaching, you really are my disciples.  Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.  So if the Son sets you free, you are free indeed.
John 8:31, 32 & 36

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
Galatians 5:1

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:13



- Freedom in Christ Ministries -


Looking upward, my friends.  He is able.  

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